Hey Momma’s! Hope
your week has been great! A friend recently remarked that she rarely does
things for herself because she’s kept busy by her family. It’s a struggle we
all share especially if you have little ones running around! I try to find
little ways to take care of myself that are manageable, not time consuming or
difficult to plan in advance. Here are those things! It was super hard to list
ten things, which probably means that I should spend more time on this but hey;
I’ve got a toddler! Literally, ain’t
nobody got time for nothing these days that doesn’t include bathing the
baby dolls for the thirteenth time this morning. I think that’s how that goes,
right? I apologize in advance for the length of this post!
1. Coffee
It is
my friend. Most days I have two cups in the morning and I’m adequately
caffeinated and ready for anything that’s going to come my way. But there are some
days, you know, the ones Momma warned you about… On those days when I’ve had
all I can take and four o’clock has settled itself conveniently in my path I
have an afternoon cup of coffee or hot tea. Hopefully I’m able to have it while
a certain little munchkin is napping and I can grab a great book or catch up on
Netflix… Idleness is my archenemy so it’s hard for me to spend naptime this way
but that’s what makes it such a great gift to myself.
2. Night-Before Prep
This is not an easy
one. While you’re doing it, it really does not feel like self love but I
promise the morning after you’ve painstakingly laid out clothes, meal prepped
breakfast and lunch, packed bags, and set the timer on the coffee pot you will
be thanking yourself. Life is hectic. That’s a fact. There aren’t many ways to
completely eliminate stress but if you are able to manage that stress more
effectively you will be a happier version of you! Your kids will love that and
so will you.
3. Kid Free Time Alone
Brandon, my husband,
works away quite a bit. During the school year Gemma and I are able to travel
with him because the big kids are away but during the summer I spend a lot of
single mom time with them and only them. While it is everything I hoped it ever
would be and more, it is so easy to get bogged down in the monotony of it all.
An easy and cheap way to recharge is to plan an hour or two without the kids.
Whether it is dropping them off at the Grand’s house to play or letting them
hang out with Dad while he’s home, I try to find something that is enjoyable
for them. I also try not to spend this alone time on errands or bill paying. My
fail proof recharge session usually happens at the bookstore with an iced
coffee (see #1) If you aren’t crazy about books the way I am, try a mani/pedi
or a short shopping trip… Us Momma’s give all of ourselves twenty four hours a
day every day of the week… That means no time off. Try to squeeze in a break,
it’ll do wonders for your mental state besides, you deserve it!
4. Girl Time
It took me such a
long time to realize the importance of great friends but boy when I did I took
full advantage of them and still do! (Sorry, girls) They are so kind and
patient and love me so much. Everybody needs that. We build relationships to
fuel one another’s lives. Those friends need you as much as you need them. Even
if it’s only a 15-minute phone call, I try to make a point to call my friends
as often as possible. This can be so hard to stay on top of (especially if you
are the only one in your group with kids) but the benefits are excellent! Being
a better friend is a great way to show that you love them but also that you
love yourself. Because after all an investment in your friendships is an
investment in your quality of life.
5. Skincare Routine
This is almost a laughable
thing (coming from the girl who used face wash and that’s all just a few months
ago) but I’m learning how important great skincare is to your overall health
and happiness as a woman. Find one that works for you! It may take a little
work and a little YouTube research but I was able to transform my skin in less
than a month just by learning to care for it correctly. At the end of a super
long day when I used to dread taking my make up off I now look forward to my
personal bathroom spa session. It doesn’t have to be expensive or fancy to
leave you feeling great about yourself and your skin! Here are some of my
favorite products right now!
6. Baking
When you have kids,
you learn pretty quickly to look for projects that offer instant satisfaction
or pretty close to it. Baking is one of those things for me. Obviously you’ve
got to enjoy being in the kitchen for this one to be considered self-love. For
me, baking is rewarding. Usually it’s a reward for my family and me. I bake and
they eat! Pinterest can be a treasure trove of recipes to try so that’s a great
place to look but lately I’ve found myself going back to the basics with
recipes I learned from my Mom and Sister. It makes me feel close to them, which
is always a plus.
7. Running
This is basically a
contradiction of #6 but its true! I don’t particularly enjoy running. I was
semi athletic as a kid and I try to maintain a certain weight… I don’t enjoy
running when I’m doing it but after I am always proud of myself and aware of
the goodness it brings. In the beginning it was torture but over time it became
more mental and emotional exercise for me than physical. It clears my head and
helps me prioritize any issues I’m facing. While I am not particularly “good”
at it I do try to go everyday and push my self. My advice for this one is to
invest in a good jogging stroller and take the little’s with you! As all the
grandma’s say “the fresh air does them good!”
8. Be Kind
… To yourself, to
your kids, to your husband, to strangers, to the mail lady, to the cashier at
the grocery store but mostly to yourself. Many times I find I have such
negative and abusive inner dialogue. Especially if I’ve eaten something I
shouldn’t have, made myself late to an important event or have run out of
patience with the kids. Those are three of my biggest triggers but everyone has
them. Whether it be your body, your kids or your deep dark struggle with being
on time, it’s so easy to start letting those things control your state of mind.
From there it’s all down hill. Literally your attitude can be it’s own vehicle
to sucky day city. Find a way to stop being so hard on yourself. We’re all just
learning, even though those other mom’s on Instagram have borderline
professional iPhone pictures and all seven of their kid’s matches while you’re
struggling with two, that doesn’t mean you’re bad at this. This is your life
and that is someone else’s life and trust me it isn’t without its struggles no
matter how perfect it looks. You are sufficient.
9. Interruption Free Momma/Baby
Time
This is a big one!
There is no one on this planet that will ever love you as much as your kids do.
That love is a gift but on the days when you’re running late and you look a
fright it’s easy to start seeing that gift as a burden. I try to set aside a
day where we can either stay in our pajamas without getting behind on life or
plan a fun outing where the main focus is my relationship with my kids. I try
to notice `everything and leave my phone in the car or at home. This sometimes
means I have an extra hectic day to make up for the free day but it’s so well
worth it. They adore the interruption free attention from me and I adore the
peace that comes from spending time with your children and watching them learn,
grow and love. This is also a good opportunity to pat yourself on the back
because you had almost forgotten what awesome kids you are raising! You’ll
probably also notice that they treat each other and you differently in the days
following… I know when the bickering and acting out is getting out of control
it’s time to plan a free day. We come to crave this quality time together where
we are all unobligated and unpressured to meet our deadlines, get in bed on
time, make a super healthy meal, be in ten places at once, etc. You get my
point.
10. Filtering Intake
For some of my
generation this is a difficult concept. But take for example the recent
shooting involving a news anchor and her cameraman. On a lot of social media
platforms the extremely graphic video of this horrible event started to
automatically play and people saw something they didn’t need or want to see.
Reading about this tragedy is hard enough. There is a lot of bad in this world,
at times it is almost overwhelming and even feels like it’s being shoved down
your throat by the media, by your family and friends… Invest your time and
energy in filtering what you allow into the very precious sanctuary that is
your mind. This is the most important way that I practice self-love. For many
of my teenage years I suffered from exhausting anxiety, which bled it’s way
into every aspect of my life until it was almost completely debilitating. The
art of learning to control what is allowed in and what is not has eliminated
that anxiety in my life. To take it a step further, I seek out the good,
positive messages and dwell on those. I sometimes use those afternoon coffee
breaks to scroll through quotes from some of my favorite people on Pinterest.
The gorgeous typography is also a bonus!
There you have it! My
Miranda-Proof (which means not-worthwhile-to-avoid) list of how I practice
Self-Love! I think it’s imperative that as women, wives and mothers we remember
that we are usually the ones holding these circuses together! It’s important to
maintain your body, your happiness, and your sanity!
Hope you are all
having a great week!
Talk soon!
XO
Miranda
P.S. Gemma got a swim cap for her birthday (2 months ago!) and wears it any chance she gets. Thought you all should know! :) Also, we hope you all have a wonderful Labor Day Weekend! See you back here Tuesday!
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